With spring finally in full bloom here in New York City, it’s time to do some spring cleaning (and I’m not talking just talking about your house). We all have things that we hold on to that should have been left in winter. I’m here to tell you that it’s time to get rid of the things that are weighing you down. Here’s how to spring clean your life.

Get Rid of Clothes You Can’t Fit Anymore

No, you’re not going to wear those pants two sizes too small if you lose weight. It will not motivate you to get back in the gym. Old clothes just take up space in your closet and if you live in New York City like me, you know how valuable every inch of space in your closet is. Make it a rule that every time you buy something new, throw out something old that you don’t wear anymore.

Let Go of Toxic Friendships

If you have a friend that only comes around when they need something, you need to say goodbye to them. They are not adding value to your life. Also for those “friends” that are super negative and constantly bring down your mood, hasta la vista!

Get Started on that Job Search

With graduation approaching, companies are hiring new grads like crazy this season. It’s true that the first applicants usually get the job; so don’t wait to apply to your dream job. Even if you believe you’re not qualified, apply anyway. You just might get that interview where you can shine.

Move Away from Your Hometown

Sometimes the best course of action is to move. Our past can hold us back from our future. In my hometown, I couldn’t thrive the way I wanted to because I wasn’t in a creative atmosphere. Once I made the move to The Big Apple, I felt fulfilled. I now have my dream career (notice I didn’t say job).

It’s alright to make changes in your life for the better. Sometimes the most drastic changes are the ones that do us the most good. So get up and clean up your life!

 

Growing up, I used to watch Bad Girls Club. It was my favorite show, and I always looked forward to new episodes. My best friend and I vowed that we would audition for the show soon as we turned 21. Sadly, they cancelled the show literally the year we turned 21. I always thought I would be perfect for a reality show. Here’s why:

I’m dramatic AF

I don’t try to hide the fact that I’m super dramatic. I take all my emotions to the extreme. If I’m mad at you, I will make sure you know it. If you take too long to text me back, I’m gonna blow up your phone. Sorry not sorry.

I’m super petty

My best friend and sisters can attest to the fact that I’m the queen of petty. I don’t know why. I think it’s a disease. But once you get me going, I don’t stop. I hold grudges and will make your life a living hell if you get on my bad side. That makes great TV.

There is so much drama in my family

Things that happen my family are like things you would see on a soap opera. I don’t know why my family brings so much drama, but if you want to be in my life, get ready for a roller coaster.

I love adventure

I hate the simple life and constantly have to be amused. That’s why I seek adventure. Bring on the biggest roller coaster and the spiciest food. I’m always down to try new things. If you want to me with me, you have to be ready to be adventurous with me. Or at least stand by my side while I do crazy things. Don’t judge me.

I don’t conform

I don’t follow others, and I hate when people tell me what to do (unless it’s in the bedroom). I follow my own guidelines and if I were on TV, everyone would either love me or hate me for it. Either way, you would keep watching me. I’m arrogant, I know.

In all seriousness, I wouldn’t go on TV and act a fool. But I would love for everyone in the world to know my name. So if you ever see me on TV, make sure you tell everyone you knew about me first. 😉

 

I came across an image on Pinterest that stated, don’t marry the man that gives you butterflies. I want to call B.S. on this image. The media is teaching women to search for men they are comfortable with instead of men that excite them. I do not agree with this philosophy. Here are my reasons why I believe you should definitely marry the man that gives you butterflies.

Excitement is important in a relationship

Let’s be honest, we all get bored with simple things. We seek excitement and adrenaline. If your relationship is not filled with excitement, it will fail. If your partner fails to give you those butterflies each time you see them, it could lead to you seeking it elsewhere.

The honeymoon phase does not have to be short term

It is believed that the euphoric phase of a relationship is just in the first year, but it doesn’t have to be. If someone really loves you, they will do whatever it takes to make you happy. They will keep trying to impress you which will keep the euphoria around. As long as two people are really trying to keep the spark in their relationship, the butterflies will not diminish.

You should be taking risks sometimes

Life is fun and you should be living it. If you have a choice between a man who gives you butterflies and a man who is nice to you and makes you feel comfortable, definitely choose the first option. Taking risks will help you enjoy life more. So maybe your relationship won’t last forever, but you will be so much happier knowing that you took that risk.

Remember, relationships don’t make you the person that you are. So don’t choose to be with someone because of the lifestyle they can provide you. It’s okay to choose happiness.

I have been known to be closed off to many people, because I hate being vulnerable. So, today is a very special day for my followers. I am exposing myself and telling you all my five top secrets. So grab some popcorn and get ready to experience something I’ve never done before.

I have wanted to be a writer since I was in elementary school, but I told my family I wanted to be a lawyer.

In my family, money was always the most important thing. So being in the arts was not an option for me. I was determined to be successful, and I needed to make a lot of money to make my family proud. When I first applied to college, I was a political science major. I didn’t change my major to English until junior year of undergrad. Who would’ve thought that I could make a living doing what I love to do?

I used to be jealous of my sister

My sister, Tiny, was always better at certain things than me. She was a great dancer, and she was always thinner and more creative than me. So, I was jealous of her all throughout high school. It wasn’t until college that I realized that we were both great at different things, and that’s alright.

Advertising actually works on me

Most people ignore commercials when they come on. They just wait for their show to come back on. I actually like commercials and if something catches my eye, I go out and buy it the same day. Pathetic, I know.

I was in an abusive relationship for over a year

I stayed with a man who verbally and physically abused me, because I didn’t believe that anyone else would want me. He pushed me in front of my younger sister, and she told me to leave him. I stayed. He actually ended up breaking up with me for another woman, and I am grateful. If he hadn’t ended things, I would probably still be in that toxic relationship.

I have a daughter named Nala

My daughter has always been a sensitive topic for me. Not many people know about her. She died shortly after I gave birth to her when I was 19 years old. I still think about her every day, and I got a tattoo in her honor.

Now that you know my deepest secrets, hopefully you feel a little more connected to me. I also hope you realize that everyone has a past, and it doesn’t define who you are today.

Most people equate expensive things with better quality. We strive to have more money than our counterparts so that we may buy more expensive things to show off. Of course there are some things that you just shouldn’t go cheap on, like breast implants. However, there are so many items affordable items that are just as good as overpriced high end products.

Department store make up

While I love TooFaced and Urban Decay as much as the other woman, we can’t forget about amazing department store brands such as Covergirl and Maybelline. Covergirl has some of the best mascara that is comparable to TooFaced’s Better Than Sex mascara. Covergirl’s LashBlast Mascara delivers outstanding volume. Maybelline delivers eyeshadow palettes that stand out on anyone. The pigmented color is great for women of color.

Shampoo

With so many options available for shampoo, it can be overwhelming to decide which product will work best for our hair. We browse the shelves and look for the fanciest bottle. High end shampoo brands claim to reverse hair damage and deliver shine; but let’s face it, there is no such thing as reversing hair damage. The only way to get rid of damage is to cut it off. All you need is a good cleanser, and that doesn’t have to break the bank.

Lingerie

The days of Victoria’s Secret being the best lingerie brand are over. Brands like Adore Me and ThirdLove have great quality lingerie without costing a fortune. You can now get a bra for less than $50 and still look sexy. Adore Me offers a reasonably priced subscription plan. ThirdLove offers 1/2 sizes, which is great if your body doesn’t fit into a specific group.

Food

Living in New York City, it is easy to pay too much for food. Restaurants charge three times the price in the city because they know people will pay for it. Four star restaurants have reservation lists as long as Manhattan; but spending so much time in the city, I can tell you that cheaper food here is definitely better than the expensive food you get a those high end restaurants. Small, family-owned restaurants are worth your time and money.

Be open to trying other brands, and you won’t have to worry about those increasing credit card bills.

A few days ago, I visited a lovely store called Namaste bookshop. The store sells books of philosophy and beautiful crystals that are believed to heal. Namaste transforms these crystals into jewelry. According to my husband, the healing stones are just a bunch of fluff that are marketed towards women who love shiny things.  On the other hand, my best friend truly believes in the magic of the stones. I listened to them argue about the subject for almost thirty minutes; so, I knew I had to try them for myself.

I bought a package of healing stones and crystals that hang from a necklace. My favorites were an amethyst and black tourmaline necklace. Amethyst is thought of as a protective stone. The sales associate at Namaste even told me it can heal headaches. I’m not sure if she was telling the truth or just trying to make a sell, but I can tell you that I haven’t had a headache since I’ve bought the stone. Coincidence? Maybe.

Black tourmaline is believed to protect against earth demons and ward off negative energies. I wore the black tourmaline on a chain all day, and that day was surprisingly positive. Also, the necklace is beautiful, so I would have worn it even if it didn’t have magical powers.

It may be all fluff; but once you believe in something, it can work just as well as medicine. Why do you think scientists still use the placebo pill? Want to find out for yourself? Check out Namaste Bookshop or visit Etsy  to buy these amazing healing stones.

The word ‘selfish’ has a negative connotation. People are expected to do for others more than they do for themselves; however, continuing in this way is harmful because it allows an excuse for people to neglect their own needs. Here are 5 times when it is okay to be selfish.

When it comes to your health

It is always okay to be selfish when it comes to your health, physically and mentally. It is alright to take a mental health day when you need it. Because of the increasing cost of living, Americans often work all day and night to support themselves and their families. While this is admirable, it can take a toll on your health. Remember to breath and take a break when needed.

In the bedroom

It is human nature to satisfy your sexual needs. I’m not saying that you must only think about satisfying yourself and forget about your partner’s needs, but it is important to communicate. If your partner is not pleasing you, make it known and talk through it. If it still isn’t working, it is definitely okay to be selfish and stop the intercourse. Don’t feel bad about hurting anyone’s feelings.

When it comes to your wardrobe

Once upon a time, I was dating a man who did not like the way I dressed. He said my shorts were too short and my tops were too tight, so he changed my whole wardrobe and bought all my clothes. I let this behavior continue for over a year before I finally said, “no more.” It is not up to a man what we wear as women. A woman is not a slut because she shows some skin. A woman is not a prude because she covers her arms and ankles. Be selfish with your wardrobe and wear whatever you want!

In your career

Be selfish in your career to get where you want to be. Don’t worry about stepping on other people’s toes. Do you and your work best friend want the same promotion? Work harder than him/her and congratulate each other later. Don’t agree to let them have the promotion. Be a monster in your career because it is your right!

For your family

When it comes to your family, being selfish is necessary. If you are stranded on an island with your family and two other families, your family’s well being comes first. All morals go out the window. It is your duty to protect what’s yours. I know it sounds evil, but you will understand if you’re ever caught in a difficult situation. Think of The Purge.

Doing for others is a wonderful thing. It creates a sufficient society. Just remember to take care of yourself as well.